My bad habit
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
i have a bad habit - ie, having high expectations of my loved ones. always trying to make sure that they work hard.
from my point of view, it is easier to check with the relevant authority than guesswork (especially if the email/letter wasn't phrased properly).
haiz.
i am such a perfectionist when it comes to judging other people. he could be working really hard and i may not know about it?
i think it is in me - whenever i do not understand certain thing, i would read up and try to understand. when i cannot balance my balance sheet, i will try to find the answer. i am always depending on myself to find out more. only at the wits' end, i would ask for guidance.
i have probably cultivated this habit during secondary school days. i want to be self sufficient than to be at the waiting side, waiting for answer.
probably it is this streak that causes me to look for my own things/goals in life as i entered into adulthood.
i need to realise that not all people are like me. some prefers to ask around while some can't wait to find it out on their own. i belong more to the latter.
because of this streak, i have stepped on the toes of my loved one. he needs help - i tried to explain to him and i said that the best way to really understand is to read up and find out himself coz my understanding is rusty (due to lack of practice). i suppose my tone over the phone sounded super duper unfriendly (this is me again - when u dun see my face, i can sound fierce over the phone.)
from my point of view, it is easier to check with the relevant authority than guesswork (especially if the email/letter wasn't phrased properly).
i want to help but how should i help to make sure that he really understands? i can only do that much to help - all things need two hands to clap.
i am such a perfectionist when it comes to judging other people. he could be working really hard and i may not know about it?
*Father, guide me as i try to be his support.
i do not want to push him aside with his questions. what can i do? take away all my proudness.
instead give me wisom, understanding, patience and love.
Father, please grant us the humility to see each other with love and offer loving suggestions.
As love is patience and kind,
Father, help us to see each other beyond our flaws and realise each other strengths so that we can complement each other instead of working against each other.
I lift all these, through Jesus,
AMEN*
posted by Francesca Cecilia at 3:01 PM, | 
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