Me, my mum & I
Just had my lunch – it was superb! Hot soup, hot claypot veggies and cold weather. Think I will continue to join this group for lunch (p.s they are vegetarians). Towards the end of the meal, a warm fuzzy feelin just passed through me and I dun feel so cold … *smug grin*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hmm, some more time left – should I call my mum and talk to her? I guess I better leave things as it is for a time being. She’s still angry – maybe she felt that she has not done her part as a mum that I have become like this. *shrug* I have to focus on the Lord and do what is pleasing to Him…
It’s quite funny how all these happened. I’m like a prey. The predator just inched up to me step by step and strikes me when the time is ripe… it’s like, before all these, she has been asking questions like ‘how much did u pay for the retreat?’, ‘how come u are not in contact with your best friend?’ or she would secretly tell my dad “that is a church song” when the TV host is singing ELDELWISS …. *FAINTZ* etc … when she asked, I thought, ‘yea, she is finally softening …’ but last night, it seems like she is building her armour – collecting all related info so that she would strike me.
All the innocent, truthful answers became her tools to attack me. I’m so confused now. Haiz.
Why dun she understand?
Why must she get so hung up over my faith? I am still alive, making sane decision and I am still coming home to eat, sleep and interact with them? If she thinks I am too busy, can’t she view that I am working? (hmm, cannot be viewed as working coz I am not paid for my time. *haha*). When I was giving tuition, she said that I am keeping myself so busy … (DUH! I am confused by her…) what does she want?
Playing mind game is tough and I am a GROWN UP…. Let me have my own space….to grow and live, please…..
Hmm, there is another hoo-ha coming up this weekend. My grandma, despite her poor health (her legs are weak and the conditions of the bones are not bery good), is going to cook laksa (why must my auntie ask her to cook laksa? she got to stand and watch the fire? can't she just eat some other laksa - though it will not taste as well - or eat something healthier (she's also quite health conscious)? Haiz!). If I dun show up, she will complain again. Guess I can only pray about it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Father, please guide me through this weekend. I pray that You will clear this blockage for me by granting me tact, patience and love on them, I pray that You can make them understand that there is more to life than money and there is a time for everything. Thank you Father, for Your patient listening ears and love for me. I lift all these to You through Jesus. Amen.
3 Comments:
but there are a few ways to do it - go for mass on sat, stay home on sun but still go choir practice on sun @ 11 or skip choir practice.
seems like blockage to me joining choir,eh?
will definitely pray over it and let God handle. =)
Keep praying. Dun give up. Remember your testimony to them is important. :)
Remember not only God invites but the devil can also invite/tempt u into quarrels and anger thots.
My view go and be with your family even if you know you are going to be presecuted there. Say a pray and invite the HS to be there to protect n guide u with his blessings.
Go in peace n give Peace to others !!!